health & self-compassion
We have access to more activities and recreational time than ever before. Modern society is flush with golf courses, resorts, parks, restaurants, clubs and more. Even more so, the internet and social media has made getting access to these actives easier than ever – some of them even being available to us virtually! Yet, for some reason we are reporting higher levels of exhaustion and feelings of being overwhelmed than ever before.
|
|
In many ways, Leading with the Head and Heart is about our health and wellness. To be a strong leaders, we must model the importance of a healthy lifestyle. Optimizing a healthy mind and body is essential to effective leadership. We are not designed to perfectly manage the stressors that come with today’s deadlines, conflicts, to-do lists, and pressures to succeed. To amplify this, many of us find ourselves continually feeling rushed and behaving as though we are always in a hurry. We must find ways to adapt to these stressors both mentally and physically. We need to pace ourselves, both our mind and body. Individual wealth is worthless without good health.
All too often we ignore the signs of fatigue, distraction, and even illness, and we just carry on. It is during these moments that we lose our luster and although we think we are doing the right thing, we are underperforming and unknowingly tarnishing our reputations. We forget about the value of self-care and we inadvertently become more focused on quantity (i.e. working more hours) than quality. Doing good work is different than simply doing a lot of work.
Our Health and Wellness Spectrum
Our overall health exists on a spectrum that ranges from illness to wellness. While few people live on either of the far ends of this spectrum, most of us drift in between, striving to spend most of our days as far on the wellness that is possible. Overall health includes both mental and physical wellness. We must consider both mental and physical health as core components to overall health – and not surprisingly, the relationship between ones mental health and physical health is quite strong. There are many obvious connections between physical health and mental health. The benefits of physical exercise such as releasing muscle tension, boosting endorphins, increasing energy, and simply becoming more physically fit all positively impact our mental health as well.
Our health is extraordinarily individualized when it comes to diet and exercise. Each year there are new dieting and exercising fads that may be exciting and generally beneficial, but we have now realized that each person is genetically and biologically wired to respond differently. A good nutritious diet is a critical part of this health and wellness puzzle – after all, we literally are what we eat. Unfortunately, there are many amenities in modern society such as fast food, processed foods, sugary drinks, and others that are more focused on profit and convenience, than population health. As of today, the best ways to combat these pressures relies on informed consumerism, health education, and social activism.
While physical exercise has a proven positive impact on our overall wellness, it is equally important to exercise our brain. Seek out intellectual challenges by doing puzzles, reading books, trivia, and engaging in stimulating conversations with friends and colleagues. Although we should be aware of the reinforcing influence of our social network, it is important to exercise our cognitive processes on a daily basis.
Mental health clinicians have long since understood the detriments of common comorbid disorders, such as depression and diabetes, or anxiety and asthma. When two or more chronic conditions exist, the costs (time and money) of treating them independently is multiplied by 150%, and outcomes decrease significantly. In contrast, when treated together through integrative care models, the costs and outcomes are drastically improved. We should continually assess our overall wellness on this spectrum, and respond accordingly. We should cherish the times that we are well, and seek support or professional help when we are drifting towards illness.
Because we spend most of our time moving within this spectrum, we should not wait until we are ill to seek help. If a swimmer is growing tired in treacherous waters it is far wiser to seek safety before they start drowning, as it may be too late.
Our health is largely influenced by a variety of external factors such as genetics and social determinants of health. We can further influence our health individually through education, diet, exercise and more. We should be aware that our abilities to seek help are significantly diminished during times of illness – both physical and mental illness. Developing a strong support system, understanding resiliency and identifying warning signs are all important ways to help combat or prevent illnesses. We must be aware that everybody is predisposed to different types of illnesses, and that does not mean we are weak.
Training Zone versus Performance Zone
Dating back nearly 1,800 years ago to the ancient Olympic Games, these athletes were the first to demonstrate an appreciation for both mental and physical recovery. Athletes today spend far more time training and practicing, than they do performing. We can benefit from becoming aware of the time that we spend in our Training Zone versus our Performance Zone. A marathoner will spend 98% of their time training for a marathon, rather than actually competing. This type of training incorporates a variety of sprints, distance, intervals, nutrition, strength-training, stretching, and more. In contrast, during a workday we may we feel we are in the Performance Zone nearly 98% of the time, leaving very little time to practice and prepare. This is the equivalent of this same marathoner simply running a marathon each day to prepare. There would be very little improvements (if any), and would likely lead to burnout. The risk of exhaustion and injury would be imminent.
Understanding that we do not need to be competing at all times allows us to create realistic expectations for ourselves. This also allows us to take time to learn and experiment, rather than feeling pressure to constantly be performing. We should allow for diversity in our learning methods involving a variety of types of intellectual stimulation that may include reading, speaking, networking, creating, and more. Just as rest is critical to an athlete’s recovery, our bodies and brains require rest to emotionally decompress, flush out build-up of hormones (and toxins) and to neurologically regenerate.
We can allow for dedicated time spent in the Training Zone to allow for both development of new ideas and strategies, and for recovery. The level of mental intensity surrounding our work will decrease as we understand the distinction between when we need to perform, and when we simply get to learn and grow.
Self-Compassion
Burnout and compassion-fatigue are two of the more common terms that describe our decreased satisfaction in work, and likely correlated decline in health. Unfortunately, both terms are overly simplified and do not address either how we got here or what we should do next. Regrettably, these terms can be misunderstood as seeking pity or even as an excuse for decreased performance or empathy in work.
Compassion-fatigue is a real thing, and it happens over time – usually many months or even years. Over time, it will erode our ability to feel and care for others, including ourselves. We may experience emotional blunting and begin to react to situations differently than we would normally expect. The symptoms of compassion-fatigue can be cognitive, emotional, somatic, and even spiritual.
When we can be fully aware of these symptoms and our functional baseline, we can better combat the detriments that compassion-fatigue has on us and those around us. We may lack authenticity, appear hurried to others, and treat information as though it is context-free. This is a true disconnection of the head and heart.
Empathy is a precursor to true compassion that enables us to experience situations as they are with others. Self-compassion is best described by Tara Brach in her book Radical Acceptance:
All too often we ignore the signs of fatigue, distraction, and even illness, and we just carry on. It is during these moments that we lose our luster and although we think we are doing the right thing, we are underperforming and unknowingly tarnishing our reputations. We forget about the value of self-care and we inadvertently become more focused on quantity (i.e. working more hours) than quality. Doing good work is different than simply doing a lot of work.
Our Health and Wellness Spectrum
Our overall health exists on a spectrum that ranges from illness to wellness. While few people live on either of the far ends of this spectrum, most of us drift in between, striving to spend most of our days as far on the wellness that is possible. Overall health includes both mental and physical wellness. We must consider both mental and physical health as core components to overall health – and not surprisingly, the relationship between ones mental health and physical health is quite strong. There are many obvious connections between physical health and mental health. The benefits of physical exercise such as releasing muscle tension, boosting endorphins, increasing energy, and simply becoming more physically fit all positively impact our mental health as well.
Our health is extraordinarily individualized when it comes to diet and exercise. Each year there are new dieting and exercising fads that may be exciting and generally beneficial, but we have now realized that each person is genetically and biologically wired to respond differently. A good nutritious diet is a critical part of this health and wellness puzzle – after all, we literally are what we eat. Unfortunately, there are many amenities in modern society such as fast food, processed foods, sugary drinks, and others that are more focused on profit and convenience, than population health. As of today, the best ways to combat these pressures relies on informed consumerism, health education, and social activism.
While physical exercise has a proven positive impact on our overall wellness, it is equally important to exercise our brain. Seek out intellectual challenges by doing puzzles, reading books, trivia, and engaging in stimulating conversations with friends and colleagues. Although we should be aware of the reinforcing influence of our social network, it is important to exercise our cognitive processes on a daily basis.
Mental health clinicians have long since understood the detriments of common comorbid disorders, such as depression and diabetes, or anxiety and asthma. When two or more chronic conditions exist, the costs (time and money) of treating them independently is multiplied by 150%, and outcomes decrease significantly. In contrast, when treated together through integrative care models, the costs and outcomes are drastically improved. We should continually assess our overall wellness on this spectrum, and respond accordingly. We should cherish the times that we are well, and seek support or professional help when we are drifting towards illness.
Because we spend most of our time moving within this spectrum, we should not wait until we are ill to seek help. If a swimmer is growing tired in treacherous waters it is far wiser to seek safety before they start drowning, as it may be too late.
Our health is largely influenced by a variety of external factors such as genetics and social determinants of health. We can further influence our health individually through education, diet, exercise and more. We should be aware that our abilities to seek help are significantly diminished during times of illness – both physical and mental illness. Developing a strong support system, understanding resiliency and identifying warning signs are all important ways to help combat or prevent illnesses. We must be aware that everybody is predisposed to different types of illnesses, and that does not mean we are weak.
Training Zone versus Performance Zone
Dating back nearly 1,800 years ago to the ancient Olympic Games, these athletes were the first to demonstrate an appreciation for both mental and physical recovery. Athletes today spend far more time training and practicing, than they do performing. We can benefit from becoming aware of the time that we spend in our Training Zone versus our Performance Zone. A marathoner will spend 98% of their time training for a marathon, rather than actually competing. This type of training incorporates a variety of sprints, distance, intervals, nutrition, strength-training, stretching, and more. In contrast, during a workday we may we feel we are in the Performance Zone nearly 98% of the time, leaving very little time to practice and prepare. This is the equivalent of this same marathoner simply running a marathon each day to prepare. There would be very little improvements (if any), and would likely lead to burnout. The risk of exhaustion and injury would be imminent.
Understanding that we do not need to be competing at all times allows us to create realistic expectations for ourselves. This also allows us to take time to learn and experiment, rather than feeling pressure to constantly be performing. We should allow for diversity in our learning methods involving a variety of types of intellectual stimulation that may include reading, speaking, networking, creating, and more. Just as rest is critical to an athlete’s recovery, our bodies and brains require rest to emotionally decompress, flush out build-up of hormones (and toxins) and to neurologically regenerate.
We can allow for dedicated time spent in the Training Zone to allow for both development of new ideas and strategies, and for recovery. The level of mental intensity surrounding our work will decrease as we understand the distinction between when we need to perform, and when we simply get to learn and grow.
Self-Compassion
Burnout and compassion-fatigue are two of the more common terms that describe our decreased satisfaction in work, and likely correlated decline in health. Unfortunately, both terms are overly simplified and do not address either how we got here or what we should do next. Regrettably, these terms can be misunderstood as seeking pity or even as an excuse for decreased performance or empathy in work.
Compassion-fatigue is a real thing, and it happens over time – usually many months or even years. Over time, it will erode our ability to feel and care for others, including ourselves. We may experience emotional blunting and begin to react to situations differently than we would normally expect. The symptoms of compassion-fatigue can be cognitive, emotional, somatic, and even spiritual.
When we can be fully aware of these symptoms and our functional baseline, we can better combat the detriments that compassion-fatigue has on us and those around us. We may lack authenticity, appear hurried to others, and treat information as though it is context-free. This is a true disconnection of the head and heart.
Empathy is a precursor to true compassion that enables us to experience situations as they are with others. Self-compassion is best described by Tara Brach in her book Radical Acceptance:
“Our capacity to relate in a tender and sympathetic way to what we perceive.
Instead of resisting our feelings of fear or grief, we embrace our pain with the kindness of a mother holding her child. We accept our own limitations with grace and self-kindness.
It is asking for help and putting ourselves in the center of our own heart.”
Instead of resisting our feelings of fear or grief, we embrace our pain with the kindness of a mother holding her child. We accept our own limitations with grace and self-kindness.
It is asking for help and putting ourselves in the center of our own heart.”
Self-compassion involves taking action on our own behalf, and being willing to be our own ally and friend to provide ongoing support and care. This is a skill that we can learn and nourish through mindfulness and exercises ranging from running, swimming and meditation. Mindfulness is paying attention to present moment experiences with openness, curiosity, and a willingness to be with what is -without judgment. We must first take care of ourselves if we are going to be able to help take care of others.